What Domestic Violence Survivors Need to Know:

1.  Domestic violence is a pattern of behaviors used by one person to gain power and control over another in a relationship. It can include:

• Physical harm or threats of harm

• Emotional or verbal abuse, like insults, humiliation, or constant criticism

• Sexual abuse or pressure

• Financial control, like taking your money or blocking you from work

• Digital abuse, like tracking your phone or messages

 2.  None of this is your fault!

• Abuse is a choice made by the person causing harm

• Nothing you did caused the abuse

• Responsibility lies with the abuser
   

​3. Why does it feel so lonely? Abusers often try to isolate survivors by:

• Cutting them off from friends and family

• Controlling transportation, money, or phone access

• Making them feel ashamed, guilty, or “crazy”

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4. This isolation is intentional.

• It is part of the abuse

• It is why connection and support are so important
   

5. You deserve safety and respect! You are entitled to:

• Feel safe in your own home

• Be treated with dignity and kindness

• Make your own choices about your life, body, and money

• Be believed and supported when you speak up

6. You are not alone. Across every community, survivors are finding support and rebuilding their lives. There are people and organizations ready to listen and help, including:

• Local domestic violence programs and shelters

• 24/7 crisis hotlines

• Advocates who can help with safety planning, legal options, and resources

• Support groups where you can connect with others who understand

• Reaching out for help is an act of courage, not weakness

​7. Ways to reach out safely.  If it is safe for you to do so, you can:

• Call a trusted friend, family member, or advocate

• Contact a local domestic violence hotline

• Use a safe device (not monitored by the abuser) to look up resources

• Talk with a counselor, faith leader, or healthcare provider you trust
   

8. If you are in immediate danger, call emergency services if you can do so safely.

9. Healing is  possible but it takes time and everyone’s journey is different. Survivors find strength through:

• Counseling or therapy

• Support groups

• Culturally specific or faith-based support

• Creative outlets like art, writing, or music

• Reconnecting with safe friends, family, and community

10. You do not have to have everything figured out today.

• Small steps count

• You are not alone

• Help is available

• Hope is real

 A Message for You

"If you are reading this and wondering whether what you’re experiencing “really counts” as abuse, know this: if you feel afraid, controlled, or constantly put down, your feelings matter. You deserve to be safe. You deserve to be heard. You deserve a life free from violence."

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